Tuesday, 17 June 2014

Malteser justification

Missing - one mojo. If found please return to the human sloth slumped in 'her' armchair, binge watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and probably snacking.

I was doing so well with cutting out sugar. I was loving writing lots and blogging away. I'd even been reading up a storm, powering through the books.

Then I stopped. 

I didn't get distracted and move on to something new. I've just entered a semi-comatose state.

I blame g. He's buggered off on holiday without me. He's actually on an intensive training course down near that London. But let's face it anywhere with food you don't have to cook yourself and no children is a holiday camp.

Me, bitter? I have no idea what you are talking about.

So while he is having a lovely time sending me what's apps of white deer in the grounds of the spectacular estate he is slumming it in. I am keeping the home fires burning. Keeping our child alive, dog walking, house stuff and the vain attempt to stop devil puss decimating the local sparrow population. Sometimes all at once.

This morning I went into the kitchen to get smudge breakfast. It ended in multi-tasking. 

I prepared a nutritionally balanced breakfast for my child - yep opened the box of frosties poured into a bowl and added milk, whilst educating her on avian biology using the sparrow remains on the door mat as a learning aid. I disinfected the floor, made a packed lunch, set the washing machine to wash the door mat - again! And combined washing the other bits of dead sparrow off the dog, who rolls in the bodies, with giving the garden a water. 

I didn't get any breakfast. I made myself a smoothie to drink on the way to work but forgot to take it with me and it spent the day making a lovely dark ring mark on my TV unit.

Is it any wonder I'm not feeling particularly energised or invigorated? These maltesers aren't a snack they're medication. I'd still be sugar free if I could buy valium in Asda!

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